So You Didn't Grow Up to be a Professional Athlete
(What Not To Do Version)

* Don't Invent Your Own Sport in an Attempt to be the Best at It

Not only will you not achieve the fame, fortune, and privilege that real professional athletes enjoy, most people will think you're weird, myself included.

Take the classic comic strip character Calvin for example. He wasn't any good at real sports so he invented his own sport named "Calvinball" to try and compensate. Calvin also had no friends, got beat up at school, talked to a stuffed animal, and his parents never seemed to care for him too much. Coincidence? I don't think so.

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